Beautiful Colouring!

It was almost sad to read that a Yorkshire village used for filming recently could only employ a handful of locals as extras because the tattoos and body piercings weren’t appropriate to the era of the film. 

Last week, while I was in another room, my children were both enjoying a bit of colouring time.  Things apparently aren’t always what they appear; my 4 year old came and stood proudly in front of me with what can only be described as fantasy stage make-up, comprising  polka dots on his eyelids and around his brows, through the centre of his face and covering his tummy, ‘Look Mummy’ it’s beautiful!’  I had to agree - a truly magical moment!  

 

The potential significance of his internal conversation didn’t hit me until a few days later however, when he started colouring his legs in the car on the way home from school.   When we arrived home, he had to stop.  He was so upset because he had only completed one leg, it took a little bit of persuading to find out why, then I heard the words I shall always remember, ‘but Mummy I’m not beautiful if it’s not finished’. 

I gently explained to him that he was gorgeous and a beautiful person, the colouring was pretty but it didn’t make him beautiful – he already was. 

 

I often wonder at the proliferation of tattoos in our society – is it because our self esteem has become so low that we think we need to ‘make ourselves beautiful’ I wonder?

‘Mummy, I don’t want your skin to go wrinkly – I like it the way it is!’  Oh boy, now that did test my response!   ‘They’re smile lines’ I replied and proceeded to show him how, when smiling, they show up more! Like most people in their 40s I’m seeing the early effects of ageing  and while I’m not at the point of surgery or Botox myself, I have an understanding of why some people choose that route -  but it doesn’t solve the problem. 

 

Dismantling these disempowering conversations is akin to dismantling what it is to be human, however they don’t need to be as loud as they are.  When the reflections looking back at us from the mirror or photos of ourselves reflect and honour us as accurately as possible we are able to hear the more empowering conversations about ourselves that have previously been pushed to the background.   This article recently shared on our Face book page highlights a perfect example. 

It is however, all in the perspective and it reminded me of a friend commenting on my ‘crow’s feet’ – up until that point I’d only known them as ‘laughter lines’!